Julian’s Column

Ooow dears, hasn’t it been cold lately? I’ve started wearing my gloves — knitted by an old dearly loved friend of mine called George — weeks before I usually do. I’ve been thinking of getting one of those hairy Afghan coats, in white, but they are a bit too much really. But as that lady says on the television, ‘Naughty, but I like it.’

Sorry to disappoint you all, but the Biograph has not got back to its usual form yet. By that I mean the films in future programmes are less than exciting. But at least the temperature there is fairly constant, know what I mean loves? For those though that are into men, as men are supposed to be according to Playboy and other mags full of nude ladies, Cliff ‘Sock it to me’ Robertson and William ‘Got it all here’ Holden show off their celluloid masculinity in Devil’s Brigade, which is the Sunday special on 3rd December. Support, for those who care, is Kill A Dragon (the Bio’s manager, Mr Wheelan, ought to watch this) and displays the talents of that sexy latin lover Fernando ‘Tango’ Lames and Jack ‘You can be in my film’ Palance.

That’s all about the Bio till next issue, so here’s a bit about my experiences during the last couple of weeks. And not the sort you lot think either.

I was at the Masquerade Club in Earl’s Court the other night and saw Mark Fleming performing. What a wicked lady she is. I’m glad I’m not a member of the Royal Family, I can do without the type of slagging she gives all the Queens, Duchesses and Princes. I noticed that she’s making a lot of cracks about the Bio. She apparently spends most of her time there in a cubicle in the ‘Ladies’. Wonder why, it must be rather lonely there.

I went up to the new gay bar the other evening. It’s the Green Room at The Wheatsheaf in Goldhawk Road. Mind you I wouldn’t like to live in Shepherds Bush, give me Brixton anytime. But I had a nice time there. I thought it would be a little quiet, but it was really busy. And lovely people too. The night I was there a few of those nice motorcycle boys were also sampling the delights. They must get cold in this weather, that leather just doesn’t look thick enough to keep them warm. The Green Room has a very pleasant atmosphere, and I love those palms. Reminds me of better days before everything went modern and flashy. In my day it was the people who were flashy. They might not have been as affluent, but they always had their flash. I keep on losing track, don’t I? The Green Room will certainly feel my presence again, and a few other times if they keep it as nice and friendly as it is now.

You won’t believe it but guess what I was sent in the post? A couple of introduction cards, one of which wanted me to ‘come as a stranger and leave as a friend’. The establishment where these goings-on happen is The Bristol Suite, ‘the club which is run entirely by the “City Girls”‘. You are supposed to ‘retreat to our intimate Bristol Lounge bar’, for whatever charms they have to offer during your discreet evening. The other card advertised the Burlesque of Berkeley Square. Here they offer you ‘lovely naughty burlesque spots every twenty minutes’, as well as ‘intimate seating’. They have a supply of ‘talkable danceable waitresses’ and are ‘all geared to the taste of the busy Executive who wants to loosen his collar after a day’s work’ and stiffen up a few other things no doubt. Fancy sending such details to me. Must be an error somewhere. In case their pleasures actually appeal to you, both establishments are situated at 14-16 Bruton Place, Berkeley Square, Mayfair W1. This is a line taken from the Burlesque card, ‘luxurious Louis XVI decor… yet casual ambience’. Somebody’s got a poetical dictionary.

Well all, love you and leave you. See you next issue. Julian’s Column will be there for you to grasp some interesting tit bits from. Wrap up warm and don’t trip over any extra large feet at the Bio.

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