Biograph review

Last issue Julian was a little peeved, in this one he’s as cross and annoyed as someone with piles in Tangiers. Ooh, those silly people at Gay News who are responsible for the pasting up of the paper. No doubt you know what I’m talking about, just in case you don’t, take a look at my last Bio review and see what those naughty people did with it. The beginning is alright, but the second paragraph is a passage from the middle of my piece, the paragraph that ties in with my opening is somewhere in the middle, and my review of the first films showing that fortnight somehow ends up at the end of the whole article.

I will have to forgive them I suppose, especially after giving me an absolutely divine lettering for Biograph Review. And that little illustration of my favourite bag at the end by my signature is very nice. One wonders what else of my personal attire will end up there. So ‘boys’ and ‘girls’ of Gay News, watch, or else Julian will do a number of you, know what I mean ‘loves’.

05-197208xx-9Now let me tell you of the films showing at the end of August and at the beginning of September at our little haven, the Biograph. On Thursday 24th August, for three days. Jean Seberg (lovely lady) and David Jannsen star together in Macho Callahan. God knows what this is about. I’ve never heard of it, and even I can’t think of something witty to say about it Macho Maudling perhaps? Support feature is Rider On The Rain, an exciting thriller, if the beloved Bio staff can manage to get the reels in the correct order. I wonder if anyone would notice though? The cast of this little beauty are Charles Bronson and Marlene Jobert.

Sunday 27th August is Western Sunday at the Bio. Henry Fonda pops up again, ably supported by James Stewart (what a man!), in Firecreek, whilst Stewart Granger (another old man of the West) stars in Flaming Frontier. If you’re into cowboys, this is for you.

When Dinosaurs Ruled The Earth with Patrick Allen and Victoria Vetri is showing for three days commencing on Monday 28th August. Times have changed, it’s my friend who thinks he rules earth now, and me especially. But I like it. Really though, it’s a super film if you like that sort of thing. Hammer films produced this historic piece. Also showing is Me,Me,Me And The Others What others? Gina (don’t say it when you’re tipsy) Lollobrigida and Walter Chiari are the principle actors in this bit of nonsense.

Thursday 31st August, for three days, has The People Next Door and C.C. And Company playing together. Well they might. Eli Wallach and Julie Harris do their thing in the former, whilst Ann-Margret (again) and Joe Namath perform together in the latter. Both portray middle-class America, are made by middle-class Americans, for middle-class Americans. Sure you’ll love them dears.

Treats on Sunday 3rd September for us. Richard (throb) Egan stars in Chubasco. But even more thrilly is another appearance by Rod Taylor, this time in Hotel. Rod shares acting credits with his friend Melvyn Douglas, and have they got their claws sharpened!

Sunflower, with Sophia Loren and Marcello Mastrioianni (Fellini’s friend), is showing for three days starting Monday 4th September. Not such a bad film, it certainly hasn’t deserved the limited screenings it has had so far. One up for the Bio. Support is An Eye For An Eye starring Robert Lansing, who lances his way through this second feature attempted thrill-maker. Good B movie, ideal companion for the rather soft main feature.

Future delights at the Bio in early September are the ‘wicked’ Baby Love, and Cosa Nostra – Arch Enermy Of The F.B.I., with our old friend from Burke’s Law (remember?) Efrem Zimbalist Jnr. in the starring role.

Before I leave you let me say “knickers” to Mr. Copeland and his sergeant-at-arms Mr.Nespit (or something like that). Seriously though, please gentlemen don’t take things so seriously, everything can be fun, really. And please Gay News staff try and get my para’s in the right order (no offence soldier). Bye for now loves.


Ed. Did you notice Julian’s deliberate mistake?

Thursday 24th August
Macho Callahan : AA : David Jannsen & Jean Seberg
Rider On The Rain : AA : Charles Bronson & Marlene Jobert

Sunday 27th August
Firecreek : A : James Stewart & Henry Fonda
Flaming Frontier : U : Stewart Granger

Monday 28th August
When Dinosaurs Ruled The Earth : A : Patrick Allen & Victoria Vetri
Me, Me, Me And The Others : A : Walter Chiari & Gina Lollobrigida

Thursday 31st August
The People Next Door : X : Eli Wallach & Julie Harris
C.C. And Company : X : Ann-Margret & Joe Namath

Sunday 3rd September
Chubasco : A : Richard Egan
Hotel : A : Rod Taylor & Melvyn Douglas

Monday 4th September
Sunflower : A : Sophia Loren & Marcello Mastrioianni
Eye For An Eye : A : Robert Lansing Thursday 7th September
Baby Love : X : Ann Lynn & Linda Hayden
The Hell Benders : X : Joseph Cotten

The Biograph,
Wilton Road, Victoria, SW1.

BIOGRAPH REVIEW

04-197208XX 09Hello all, it’s your Julian again. A rather cross Julian this issue I’m afraid. Now I know not all of you are interested in my reviews from the heart, but you don’t have to be nasty about them. If you knew the effort involved, and the expense. I know the Biograph isn’t the most expensive of cinemas, but with the amount of visits I pay it, the money soon mounts up. Not that it’s just a question of money, it really is hard work spending so many hours in that cinema. Which brings me back to why I’m a little peeved.

On Sunday 13 August the celebrated transvestite Tony Curtis performs in the explicitly titled Not With My Wife You Don’t. Wouldn’t want to dear, would you? Support is First to Fight with all-American boy Dean Jagger (no relations to the Queen of the pop world) in featured positions throughout the film.

Alan ‘Swoon’ Bates and the grand-daddy of the theatre Lawrence Olivier are the stars of Three Sisters on Monday 14 August I haven’t seen this before, and at the time of writing I can’t quite see why so many men are in a film with such a title. Maybe they are doing impersonations. Lex Barker is startling, to those who like that sort of thing, in the programme’s second feature, Wild Kurdistan, an epic from the East.

Hulk John Wayne and Forrest Tucker (star of many a memorable second feature horror movie) appear together in Chisum on Thursday 17 August. This is a notable failure, with everyone just trying to prove how butch they are. and we all know pear old John Wayne’s acting capabilities aren’t that good. What they are showing as support feature seems as if it will be much better, it’s another of those lovely motorcycle films by the sound of it. The film in question is Dirty Angels with Lino Capolicchio in a starring role.

The biggest treat of all in the next fortnight at the Bio is showing on Sunday 20 August. Liz Taylor and Richard Burton play happy families in Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf. Even if you have seen this before I recommend you to see it again. Those of you with acid tongues can certainly pick up a few tips from Miss Taylor’s performance in this epic of domestic bliss.

Also showing is Seven Golden Men. That really sounds a goody, and it has also missed my attention in the past, even though it sounds just the type of film that I would like.

Monday 21 August has womaniser of note, Rod Taylor, gallantly supported by Carol White, together in The Man Who Had Power Over Women. It’s not just women that Mr. Taylor has power over, to judge audiences’ reactions at the Bio in the past. Ann-Margaret, the lady who tried to show Elvis Presley a thing or two till she realised that he wasn’t interested, is featured female lead in the second half of the programme, The Tiger and The Pussycat. She is ably supported by Vittoria Gassman from Battersea.

Future attractions include When Dinosaurs Ruled The Earth and Rod Taylor in Hotel. What a super name he has, so straight to the point. And if one believes the rumours……

As you all know, a new paper just as this can do with all the mentions in the rest of the press that it it can get So when I heard that OZ had given us a little write up I was pleased to say the least. In fact I was going round to see their staff to give them all a big kiss of gratitude. But once I had read their piece I changed my mind. They certainly would get more than a kiss now. I believe a gentleman named Felix the Dennis was responsible for the piece they printed, and although he was full of praise for the rest of the newspaper, he had a little go at yours truly. Was I mad! Let me tell you Felix, my tongue is usually everywhere else except in my cheeks, and I don’t quite see how a useful guide to entertainment smacks of sad old magazines and coy innuendos. I just describe what I see and say what I think. I know I’m not (quite) another Alexander Walker but I try me best. If Julian manages to miss something because of his Biograph indulgences, well all I can say is that even I (after years of practice mind you) am not as perfect as I might like to be But I mustn’t go on about my grumbles. See you in the Bio Felix.

Hasn’t it been hot lately? Really not the sort of weather for the cinema some may say. Generally though one finds cinemas somewhat cooler than outside, unfortunately not at the Biograph. The temperature in that establishment always seems to be on the up.

Minor point. Dear Bio management, it’s nice to know that you care about your clientele. But is it really necessary to pop round so often with your little cans of air-freshener. Such an unsuitable fragrance too, better kept for the convenience I would have thought. It’s nice to know that you worry about us, but do please try aiming the cans in the air and not at the height our heads are at. Ruins ones ice or lolly.

August has some interesting films showing at the Bio. To start with on Thursday 10 August Brother John, with Sidney Poitier is on the screen, with Brotherhood of Satan as support. The latter stars L.W. Jones and Strother Martin in the leading roles. This black magic saga scared me half to death the first time I saw it.

For The Biograph programme see Classifieds Page 11.